How To Change Behavior

 Behavior:  What is it??

• A form of communication
• A way of meeting needs
• An attempt to cope with demands, control impulses, conform to accepted social conduct
• A way of avoiding people, places, or tasks
• A result of pain, hallucinations, medical issues
• A result of complex neurological and sensory processes

Why do people behave a certain way?

• Modeling
• Accident
• Instinct
• Conditioning

Why do people continue to behave a certain way?

• Because IT WORKS! 

How can we change behavior?

• Ask yourself what the person wants to get and/or get away from when they exhibit a certain behavior
• Ask yourself if the person was successful in getting or getting away from the answer to the above question.  If the answer is yes, that behavior will continue
• To change an undesired behavior, you must change it so the person isn't able to meet their need using that behavior

Example:
Problem:  Patty doesn't like to do school work, she has the ability, but it can be difficult and takes a long time.  BEHAVIOR: During work time, she is playing with materials in her desk.  CONSEQUENCE: An adult comes to her and talks to her about not working.  As the year progresses, Patty is doing less and less and getting more and more attention.  Sometimes adults ignore her and let her sit, then BEHAVIOR: she starts to make noises and moves around the room.  CONSEQUENCE:  adults spend time with her trying to get her to work or go to a time out spot/office/etc.

Solution:  BEHAVIOR:  Patty is messing around, not working.  CONSEQUENCE: adults ignore her.  BEHAVIOR:  Patty starts to escalate by shouting out, breaking pencils, etc.  CONSEQUENCE: adults continue to ignore her.  When it comes time to do a preferred activity, Patty isn't allowed to do it until her missed work is completed.

Result:  While kept in from a desired activity, Patty became very angry and much more defiant. The adults continued to not engage with her and just maintained safety.  The next time Patty was kept from a desired activity, the amount of time she spent throwing a fit was greatly reduced and the behaviors were less severe.  This trend continued until Patty was getting her work done with her class.  On the occasions this didn't happen, she did it quickly during the preferred activity and rejoined her peers. 

Patty was a child who wasn't working initially because it was a bit of a chore, however, she continued not to work because she liked all the attention she received.  The adults around her removed all verbal prompts, time next to her helping her, and even eye contact when she was inappropriate.  She was given all of those things when on task.  Once Patty figured out that nothing she did was going to get her the attention she wanted, she began to comply.

Adult cheat sheet for working with a child who is attention seeking inappropriately:

• Don't engage verbally or physically unless to maintain safety
• Once person is compliant have them make restitution for things that happened, if applicable
• Reconnect with the person somehow to let them know that your relationship is still intact (ask to hug, give high five, tell them you forgive them when they apologize etc.)
• Allow them to be part of the class/activities that occur after they are compliant (this can be very difficult as we tend to want to continue to punish for the behavior that they have made restitution for, but it is very important to let it go with the person)

Important tips when changing behavior:

• Most undesired behavior will escalate once we change how we react to it.  People are trying to figure out what it is going to take for them to get the desired outcome they are accustomed to getting.
• We MUST stay consistent and not give in.  If we give in, we are teaching them to fight harder and longer to get what they want.
• It will take as long as it takes, however, the more consistent we are, the quicker the process will go. 
• Roger MacNamara, President of Abuse Prevention Specialists notes that "Attempting to control others by gaining compliance is the leading cause of abuse." We can't control others, only ourselves.  When we change how we react to certain things, it brings about change in others.
• I promise you, there is HOPE!