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Tuesday, October 18, 2011

Taming the "Tattling Monster" in Your Classroom

1. Understand Why Children Tattle. Children tattle for a variety of reasons. Most young children use tattling as a means to help them learn the difference between right and wrong. Older elementary-age students often tattle to gain attention from adults, use adults to solve problems, get someone else in trouble, or to be perceived as “good” or “better than” others.


2. Teach the Difference Between Tattling and Reporting. Children should know where to “draw the line” when it comes to tattling. They need to be taught the difference between tattling and reporting at an early age. In simple terms, telling on another person for the sole purpose of getting him or her into trouble is tattling. Reporting, on the other hand, is telling on another person to keep him or her from doing something dangerous or destructive.
Examples of tattles:
· “Julie and Marcy won’t play with me.”
· “Heather said my shirt was too small.”
· “Nicholas looked at me funny.”
Examples of reports:
· “Michael copied my test answers.”
· “Grayson fell off the swing and she’s crying.”
· “Celia is talking to a stranger on the other side of the fence.”

3. What You Can Do
·         Set up a situation box. Let students know that if they have a concern about a classmate and need your help dealing with it.  They can write a note and leave it in the box. Tell them that you will read the notes before the end of the day and follow up with each student. Reassure them that they can still see you without leaving a note to report a student doing something harmful or dangerous.
·         Lead a class discussion asking students how it feels to be “tattled” on. This will help those who are prone to tattling understand that their actions have consequences. Ask for input from your students to help those frequent “tattlers” learn the difference between “tattling” and “reporting.”
·         Make your classroom a safe environment for reporting. Students need to know they’ll be protected if they report information to an adult in an effort to keep their peers safe.
·         Encourage students to ignore behavior that does not affect them. When a student complains about behavior that is not destructive or dangerous and does not affect her, let her know that it is not her concern. You might say, "I'm happy to see that you know how to behave, but I would prefer that you not tell me about behavior that does not concern you."
·         Encourage students to settle problems on their own. For example, if students are fighting over something, you can ask them, “Is this my problem?” then encourage them to figure out a solution.
·         Don't automatically dismiss a student's concern. Be especially attentive to reports that suggest that a student is being bullied, especially if you get similar reports from more than one student. Follow your school’s guidelines for bullying.
·         Stop a student before they get a chance to tattle. If you sense that a student is about to tattle, stop the student before they complete their thought.  Ask, "Are you about to tattle, or are you going to tell me about a student who is doing something harmful or dangerous?" If they tell you the latter, let them finish their thought.
·         Avoid putting students in charge of their classmates. Putting a student in a position of authority may encourage student conflict.

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