1. Be sure that your statement is enforceable.
Unenforceable Statement: Be nice to each other. Quit fighting.
Enforceable Statement: You guys are welcome to come back as soon as you work that out. Good luck.
2. Know how you plan to enforce the limit before you state it.
3. Avoid "Fighting Words." Fighting words are a call to battle, and include:
a. Telling the student what to do.
"You get to work right now!"
b. Telling the student what you will not allow.
"You're not going to talk to me that way!"
c. Telling the student what you won't do for him/her.
"I'm not letting you leave for recess until your work is done!"
4. Use "Thinking Words." Thinking words include:
a. Telling a student when he/she can do something.
"Feel free to go out to recess as soon as your work is done."
b. Telling the student the conditions under which the adult will do something.
"I'll be glad to help you with your work when you go to your seat and raise your hand."
c. Describing the choices a student has.
"Feel free to participate with the group, or do the assignment on your own time."
*Adapted from Jim Fay's Love and Logic
