Verbal Responses to Teasing

Use the idea below to teach kids some ways to respond to teasing.   
*adapted from Thomas Walsh's documents on Broadmoor Technical Center site

Verbal Jujutsu!  Heiiii Yah! Or how to defend against teasing.

Jujutsu, literally meaning the "art of softness", is a Japanese martial art consisting of techniques that were developed around the principle of using an attackers energy against him, rather than directly opposing it, thereby protecting both the attacker and the artful defender.  

Remember, only the weak feel the need to tease.

Ambivalent Responses:

• So? So what?
• Who Cares?
• Oh well.
• That's cool.
• Whatever.
• What do you mean?
• Maybe.

Assertive Responses:

• And your point is? 
• Thank you.
• Good one.
• I don't have time for this.
• I'd respond, but I can associate with you.
• That's your opinion.
• I don't appreciate your remark.
• A lady/gentleman never responds to unkind remarks.
• That doesn't bother me.
• Why would you want to say something like that?

  Silly Responses (throw them off gaurd)

• Is that from a movie?
• What do you mean?
• Interesting you think that way.
• What gave you that impression?
• I don't speak your lingo.
• Oh yeah?  Well okay then.
• I'd sling mud back, but I don't want to mess up my clothes.
• The measure of a person is their ability to ignore negativity. 
• Can you say that 3 times fast?
• My mom taught me better than to say those things. 
• We'll have to agree to disagree.
• I'd argue with you, but I'd be late for my basket weaving class.

 

Giving and Getting Respect

I pulled the following information from Dr. Mac's Amazing Behavior Management Advice website...

When students feel valued, respected and welcomed in their classroom, they are more likely to behave better and demonstrate respect toward you.  Here are a few tips for creating the optimal classroom environment.
 
Build your "rep" by communicating and showing concern for the welfare of your students.
    -Display concern
            *When they ask: "Why did you call my parents?"   or
                                           "Why did you give me detention?"
            *Answer with:     "Because I care about you." or                                            "Because I know you're capable of 
                                             so  much more."

    -Converse with your students outside of class.  Give them   the time of day.  Build a friendly relationship.

    -Use your expressive and receptive humor.  See the humor in situations and create joy for your students.

Positive Behaviors at a Glance

Use the below definitions to teach positive behaviors to your class.  Have them give examples and role play.  These fit perfectly with the PBIS model for schools.

 *For younger children, check out this chart for teaching respectful, responsible, and safe behaviors. 

Safe Behavior

Looks Like:  Hands to self.  Feet on the floor.  Slow and controlled movements.  

                             Thinking  before doing.

Sounds Like:  Soft tones.  Kind and non-threatening words.  Pleasant.  
                                "I trust you."  "I feel comfortable."

Feels Like:  Comfortable environment for everyone.  Free from harm or
                            the threat of harm. No worries. 

Responsible Behavior

Looks Like:  In class and on time.  Participating in lesson.  following directions.  

                              Focusing on your own learning.

Sounds Like:  Asking questions.  Asking permission.  Sharing ideas.  
                                 Admitting mistakes and celebrating accomplishments.  
                                 "I'm sorry."  "I appreciate you."  "I'm proud of you."

Feels Like:  Productive.  Participative.  Thorough.  Proud of best effort.  Self controlled. 
                            Self directed.  Proactive.

Respectful Behavior 

Looks Like:  Kind facial expressions.  Pleasant body language.  Proper personal distance. 

                              Looking others in the eye when talking. 

Sounds Like:  Kind words.  Soft tones.  Honesty.  
                                "Excuse me."  "Thank you."  "Please."

Feels Like:  People's feelings, beliefs, thoughts are being given sensitive consideration.  

(Adapted from Crosstrails Points and Level System, Overland Park, Kansas and taken from BSP Desk Reference)

Relationship Building Activity

With the first week of school underway, this short video outlines a great activity to use in the classroom for relationship building.  Discipline problems decrease when we have developed positive relationships with, and between, students.  It's labeled for grades 6-12, however, the activity will work for younger grades as well. 

 “I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.” 

-Maya Angelou

Beginning of the Year Procedures

As you are getting ready for that first day, remember to teach your expectations for routines and procedures that you want students to follow.  Teach your expectations BEFORE your students engage in an activity.  MONITOR their behavior during the activity.  Then give students FEEDBACK (Both constructive feedback and positive feedback).   Continue to PRACTICE, PRACTICE, and PRACTICE!  Practice later that first day; practice the next day; practice later that week; and continue to practice throughout the year. 

Examples of important routines/procedures to teach could be:

1.     How to sharpen pencils:

·        When should they sharpen their pencils?

·        Can they talk while waiting in line to sharpen pencils?

·        How many students are allowed to be in line at the pencil sharpener?

·        What path do they take to and from the sharpener?

·        How many pencils can they sharpen at a time?

Other suggested procedures or routines to teach might be:

2.     Restroom use

3.     Getting a drink of water

4.     Lining up

5.     How to get teacher’s attention

6.     How to walk in hallway

7.     Lunchroom/playground behavior

8.     Assembly behavior

*Check out this list developed to help you walk through the steps needed to prepare in detail for classroom procedures and routines.  Not all will apply to you, but it’s a great tool to remind us of all the things to plan for.  Hope it is useful for you.

(Thanks to Mike Otto, principal in St. Joseph, MO, for sharing the list linked above)